Red Sleigh DownSat, 24th Dec '05, 4:15 am::

Breaking News: In a heroic triumph of National Security Enforcement, an unidentified aircraft was shot down over rural Minnesota early this morning.

Reports from US Intelligence confirm the aircraft was linked to evil-doing Al-Qaeda Terrorists and ISB-TLK (Iranian Suicide Bombers That Love Karaoke). Analysis of the cargo suggests fissile bomb making material was being distributed to sleeper cells throughout the US to fuel the liberal attack on Christmas by toppling Jesus as the symbol of Freedom.

The 300lb self-proclaimed "Jolly" aircraft pilot in festive red attire has been transferred to US Naval Station Guantanamo Bay for aggressive questioning while his pack of eight flight-enabled Cervidae were traded in for a brand-new H2 Hummer with $0 down and low monthly payments. As usual, the White House suggests people be on the lookout for suspicious strangers and has raised the Terror Alert Level to Fuchsia.

Inspired by a Farker

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