My cats Giga and Tera were born 18 years ago today. Happy Birthday Giga! I miss Tera so much and I know Giga does too because after her passing, he has been so much more affectionate with our Chihuahua Lady Bug. In cat years, Giga's a spry 126 years old, though he is jumping and running less these days. Lady Bug is probably 15-17 years old and more docile too. We adopted her in 2010 from someone who didn't know her age but despite a ton of health issues years ago, she has recovered well.

We left Florida last winter after rehoming most of our pets that we could not bring to Illinois - our goats, chickens, tortoises etc. It has been a lot less stress for me but like Juliet and the kids, I do miss walking into the yard to pet them. And now with only aging Giga and Lady Bug, when at one time we had 4 devious cats and 2 loud dogs on top of the rest of the petting zoo, things are a lot calmer, quieter, maybe even a bit morose.

You read about life in books. You watch movies and shows about characters living their lives. But you never step back and think of your own life as just another story in the encyclopedia of homo-sapiens. While everyone sees themselves as the main character in their own lives and some even talk and write about themselves in depth, we rarely see ourselves as simply another tiny human going about our short lives doing typical human things. But the more I think about our pets, especially the ones no longer with us, the more I realize how much I am fulfilling my role as a standard-issue human-being. I pet the cat, I feed the dog, I throw a ball towards my child, I move heavy things for my wife. I am human adult.

In a world where people are hustling for fame and fortune, struggling to make a name for themselves, and striving to achieve productivity goals, I am patting myself on my back having taken a single celebratory cat photo earlier today. Not because I can't be productive or am done with goals but rather because thinking about my pets connects me to the saga of humanity while inventorying my achievements and failures singles me out and makes me feel isolated, unique.

Thinking of myself as unique and special with the agency to determine my destiny is exhausting. Accepting that I am human #106,839,249,965 going about my silly little life is relaxing and frankly, cute in a metaphysical way. There's no checklist of activities humans need to do to qualify as valid human and getting 100% in some exam or making $X of money would definitely not be on that list. But if there was such a list, getting nuzzled by a fuzzy cat should be on it, along with burning your tongue because you bit into food that was still too hot and staying up way past your bedtime because you enjoy the present company. These are human things, these little incidents, events, and activities weave the narrative of our lives. Pets, friends, family, love, kids, breeze, rain, that little bit of dirt still left over no matter how many times you try to sweep it into the pan with the broom — these tell the tale of our lives.

We love to read stories, play stories, watch stories, hear stories, and make up stories. And every single story is about life. There are no stories of rivers just flowing, molecules just colliding, and numbers just incrementing. Stories are about life. And life, when viewed through the eyes of a master storyteller with a penchant for small wonders, becomes ever so fulfilling. The passage of time, the grief of losing loved ones, the ennui of navigating human institutions — these hurt, stress, and aggravate me on an individual level but they make me feel like I am checking all the items on the being-human to-do list when I take a step back and observe.

Today I took a step back to observe. Tomorrow I have a ton of meetings and chores. C’est la vie.

I've always had a love-hate relationship with sleep. While I never have a problem falling asleep and seldom wake up in the middle of the night for any reason, I rarely shut my eyes and just wake up 6-8 hours later. Between the time I fall asleep and wake up are hours and hours of dreams and nightmares that keep me engaged each night. I'm planning on staying up late tonight to "reset" my dream/nightmare cycle. I can recollect most of my dreams every morning if I want but usually avoid doing so.

Many of my dreams have recurring themes. One common dream I have is finding entirely new rooms and sections of my own house or my parent's house. A recurring nightmare I have is realizing I have a final exam today for a class I have somehow signed up for but never attended or studied for. My dreams are often surreal and geography agnostic - I could be in SeaWorld, Orlando and walk up to the street vendor in Kolkata for a quick snack. My nightmares are a cross between 24 and Everybody Loves Raymond - a ticking time-bomb of social awkwardness.

I have always had dreams and have failed to explain the cause despite my meticulous attempts to analyze my diet, exercise-level, moods, entertainment, stress, or health. I love finding patterns but I can't seem to find any with respect to my sleep cycles and dreams. What I do know for certain is that if I sleep less, I can't seem to recall my nightmares. This makes me a little tired physically but mentally I feel a lot more refreshed than if I sleep 7-8 hours and have 3 hours of nightmares. So every few days, I stay up late to try and reset the cycle so I can get more dreams and fewer nightmares. If I sleep more than 7 hours, I am guaranteed to have a bunch of nightmares that will affect my mood for the rest of the day.

In order to prevent or minimize the negative effect from nightmares, I used to control my dreams, but I stopped doing that because it was extremely exhausting and no different from being awake for many hours every night watching foreign films without subtitles. I've tried "planning" as I fall asleep - planning everything from my next day's todo list to life goals and dreams. I've tried meditating and clearing my mind as I fall asleep. None of these have any effect on the onslaught of dreams and nightmares each night. While one might say these nightmares are a result of suppressed emotions, repressed memories, or personal anxiety, I would disagree with that because (a) I live a pretty drama-free life with barely any social or interpersonal conflicts (b) I've had both vivid dreams and nightmares since I was a carefree kid, and (c) my dreams often segue to nightmares and vice versa so it's not a well-defined condition like after-effects of PTSD.

As a result of these dreams and nightmares, I like to stay up late and sleep fewer hours. But all is not lost. There are fun things I can do as I fall asleep. I can transition into a wake-initiated lucid dream as I slowly fall asleep and make myself hear any music or sounds I want. It's like the world's largest iPod library in my own head. I just think of a song and I can hear the entire orchestra with all the small, distinct notes playing clearly in surround sound. Or I can think of a voice and converse with anyone I want, just like in real life. Sometimes, I can even make myself "see" anything I want with my eyes closed. I only do these things as I'm slowly falling asleep. If I'm already asleep and realize that I am in a dream-state, I choose not to control it because it is exhausting like I mentioned in the previous paragraph.

When I'm not actively dreaming but still lazy enough to not get out of bed, I do a lot of problem solving in my sleep and love it. Often I will get stuck on a computer project during the day and find the most optimal solution during my sleep. I don't think I "dream" the solution but rather think of many different solutions in a relaxed state, devoting a larger part of my active concentration to solving the problem instead of sensing environment, taste, sounds, or sights. I would love to be able to get into this state more often, though not at the cost of peaceful sleep.

Sometimes when I've had just the right amount of wine, I go to bed and wake up feeling refreshed 8 hours later without any dreams. I'm sure I still dream but as long as I don't remember dreaming when I wake up, I'm happy. I just hate feeling tired every morning because I was writing, directing, and acting in a live-action movie in my head for the past few hours. Here's hoping for a dream-free night!

Yesterday evening we ripped off all the carpet in our house and earlier this morning I dumped off all the smelly carpet pieces in the landfill. Under the carpet was a pretty decent layer of laminate wood. It is much cleaner than carpet but still not decent enough. We will be getting tiles in our entire house pretty soon. I've been saving for new tiles for a while now and it's about time to get them installed. I also moved around the furniture in the living room and my computer room and the house now has a lot more open space.

We're going to Juliet's grandma's house tomorrow for Thanksgiving Dinner. I have an exam and a presentation due on Monday so this weekend will be study-time once again. Tonight, Juliet and I are watching a bunch of movies.

I did not know that Florida had two time zones. I am currently sitting on Juliet's bed in a cute little apartment in the Florida State Hospital campus in Chattahoochee where she will be staying for the next six weeks. She is here for her first clinical rotation; the concentration is psychiatry. After this she has seven other rotations in seven different fields and hospitals over the next year and a half. If this past year of school was intensive and stressful, the next one for her will be extensive and adventurous.

Chattahoochee is a five-hour drive from our home in St. Petersburg and the clocks here run an hour behind. It is a quaint little town with a rich local history. The long drive into the town through the scenic rolling hills and narrow lanes reminded me of Wyoming where we eloped to last year for our wedding and honeymoon. Who knew that a year later I would be dropping her off in a remote town for a month and a half with such a heavy heart. I'm incidentally leaving for the same mountains and canyons of Wyoming in a few days for my ultramarathon. I really wish she could have come with me but this clinical rotation is a huge opportunity for her career and I wouldn't want anything less than that for her.

Yesterday was the "White Coat ceremony" at her university where the teachers officially gave students in her class their medical white coats as a rite of passage, thus bestowing upon them the responsibility and trust that is expected of a medical care professional. It was a short and sweet procession and Juliet was awarded a scholarship for being the top student in her class. I cannot put into words the amount of effort and dedication that she put into her studies over the past year and was immensely proud to see her hard work being rewarded in front of hundreds of students and their family and friends. Most students in graduate and post-graduate programs, including yours truly, just do enough to get decent grades so they can move on to the next course. Not Juliet. She gave every lecture, class, lab, quiz, test, and exam her utmost best. While her eighteen-hour study days drove both her and me crazy, I realized that very soon she will make a genuinely caring and brilliant Physician Assistant. I am very proud of her and so happy that she is in my life.

Our friend Sandra and her daughter Madison were also at the ceremony and took lots of photos. We celebrated the night with some yummy Hibachi and crashed early. We packed both our cars this morning with all the things Juliet will need for the next six weeks and drove up to Chattahoochee. Once I get back home, I will try to put some of the pictures from her ceremony online. Right now I'm stuck in a small town without any wired Internet access and am using a laptop tethered to a cellphone to write this 'blog entry. And Juliet just prepared some dinner for me so my tummy says good bye Internet!

Tonight I worked on my business school project while the Oscar ceremonies were on. I set my DVR to record the whole show and went back to working on my assignment nonchalantly. It was only when my dad called me from India and exclaimed "Jai Ho!" that I realized that my favorite musician A. R. Rahman had won the Oscars for the best original score and the best original song for Slumdog Millionaire. I said "That's so awesome" to my dad and went back to studying. Maybe I was just stressed about the project or maybe it was something else but I felt quite uneasy after that phone call. That was quite a stereotypical American hipster response coming from me, as if I have become so unfazed by media, splendor, and glitter that Oscars are passé and winning awards is dull.

Once I completed my assignment, I watched the entire Oscar ceremony in about an hour, with the gratuitous use of the fast-forward button. In true Oscar-audience fashion, I laughed and I cried, I cheered and I clapped. When it was over, I went online to read more about the Oscars and hear what others were saying. I often do that after major events, just to feel like I'm part of a global community at 1 am. To my dismay, other than the big media outlets like CNN and BBC, none of the sites I frequent cared much about the Oscars. One or two even mocked them and the winners. It was the consequent feeling of cognitive dissonance that prompted me to stay up well past my bedtime and write my thoughts down.

Americans just don't get the American Dream. They read about it in books and think it is a house in the 'burbs with a white picket-fence and a big dog. They think immigrants from all over the world come here just to buy a big house and watch the Super Bowl. I know this is what they think because I've been living here for the past eight years and by all accounts I'm living proof of having achieved it. But that's not what THE American Dream is. The American Dream that millions upon millions of people around the world aspire to achieve someday is not a mediocre life of relative stability with a two-car garage and automated bill payment.

The American Dream is being born as the youngest of eight children, failing medical entrance exam, dropping out of law college, joining film institute against family's wishes, and fourteen long years later winning a god-damned Oscar in front of the whole world. The American Dream is not the glory but the never ending struggle that one must go through while everyone around you has become complacent and already accepted the status quo as their fate. The American Dream is daring to dream that despite the millions before you who tried and failed, you have something within you that sets you apart and ever-so-slightly shifts the odds in your favor.

The saddest part about the American Dream is that for most people, it stops the moment they set foot in the country. I vividly recall my first flight to the US. I was nervous but determined. As the plane reached cruising altitude, I managed to calm my emotions down. After all, I had just bid my family, friends, and home for twenty years good bye. I told myself that I will make my parents proud and my friends will someday say "he used to sit right here next to me in class." I did not have a specific goal in mind and especially did not care about money or riches. As boring as it sounds, I just wanted to be "somebody." I just wanted my piece of the American Dream.

Eight years later, here I am. I've assimilated quite well. I have a gorgeous loving wife, lots of pets, a wonderful job, a nice house, two cars, and for the first time in my life, a real savings account. Having all of my wishes come true wasn't the American Dream. Arguing with my dad for two years to let me come to the US against his wishes, was. Having my sister determine the fate of my life because my dad asked her if I should be allowed to go to the US, was. Living alone for six of the past eight years and managing to remain optimistic about my future life, was. And yet, I haven't struggled even one-percent as much as most of the other immigrants who come here. By most standards, I've had it pretty easy. My American Dream delivered above and beyond my expectations. For most, it doesn't. It stops being a dream when the bills pile up and discrimination begins. The only glint of hope is that the kids will have a better shot at life someday.

I don't care to watch the Oscars because Meryl Streep has been nominated for the fifteenth time. I watch them because I want to see a grown man cry like a baby when he realizes that this very moment is the culmination of forty years of hard work. I watch them because I want to see lives changed and careers validated. There are no triumphant awards for programming web services or coding warehouse systems. Watching others get rewarded for their hard work is the closest that I can get to feeling like there is still some fairness in this world; that tireless efforts are eventually rewarded and perseverance pays off in the end. Watching others achieve their dreams helps me keep my dreams alive, however incomparable they might be.

The American Dream is not about money, fame, or power but about beating the insurmountable odds. The American Dream is never accepting that the best part is already over. The American Dream is achieving it and starting it all over again.

I'm sitting outside in our Florida room next to Juliet, huddled in a blanket, studying on my laptop. I can see our three turtles, Loch, Ness, and Wolf swim around in the two aquariums along with the fishes and Giga keeps looking for ways to escape back into the house. The gliders Paxil and Rita are asleep and so is Herbert the tortoise. Jack, Tera, and Cookie are inside the house, probably asleep.

We went to Treasure Island beach yesterday for a stroll and had wonderful Thai food for lunch. We watched The Score last night. A two-hour movie is pretty much all the time we can spare to sit in front of a TV without starting to worry about projects, papers, and exams these days. She keeps glancing over to read what I'm typing and I keep hiding it from her. The sounds one hears in this room are soothing - the pitter-patter of the water in both the aquariums, chirping of morning birds perched on eaves and evergreen boughs, wind-chimes swaying in the winter breeze, and leaves rustling in the wind - it's quite a relaxing environment if you can tune out the infrequent automobile noises.

I have to write a six-page paper by noon and have more school assignments after that. I also have to work on a website with Tay whenever he hops online. Juliet has two exams this week. I got 97/100 in my Accounting exam last week. I cared tremendously about my grades back in undergraduate college but now I don't give much value to grades. The new things I am learning are valuable enough without me fretting over grades. It's back to reality for me now, i.e. the six-page paper that I have to write in a little over two hours.

I had my first real in-class exam today after a break of four and a half years from college. I think I did well for someone who barely had the time to sit down and study. I have been pressed for time lately and this very lack of time is gradually teaching me how to better manage my todos, stress, expectations, and goals in quite an unorthodox way. I know my thoughts below will initially seem to be going all over the place but just hang on a bit because I will eventually reach the focal point that I intend to discuss.

The problem with life is that for most people, it really is the same story day-in and day-out. Even if you have an exciting work or social life, the excitement has the same flavor on a day-to-day basis. Then one day something changes and it starts to get more stressful. You can't change your life around immediately to counteract the increased stress, so it builds up. Pretty soon you fall way behind on your todo list and your goals and hopes are nowhere in sight. A few years later you ask yourself how did I end up here and whatever happened to my dreams and all those plans.

At the same time, you see successful people in every walk of life around you. The gym instructor is in better shape than you'll ever be, your coworker knows more about Excel than you thought was possible, your sixty year old neighbor can run faster and further than you can, the mechanic knows more about your car than you ever will, your friend has read more books than you can imagine, and even the stupid guy who interrupts movies on cable TV seems to cook better than you can ever hope for. It is as if we are being told we suck at life by being encouraged to be good at everything and we are going crazy trying to deal with it all.

Then New Year's Day comes around and the go-getters among us make resolutions and promises. Time to join gyms, lose weight, start reading, help the community, sign up for a music class, and take a course in web designing. All of this is supposed to make us a better person and help us grow. And I am all for it too, regardless of when and how you start. Knowledge, skill, and art makes one a well-rounded person so go for it by all means. The problem isn't that these things don't help us in the long run. The problem is that they displace the honest, self-actuating goals we had on our list and have forgotten over time. What was once a list of unique, personal goals, goals that truly mattered to you, is now a list telling you to sign up for pilates, swing dancing, and pottery classes just like eighty million others.

The trick is to not buy into it. I don't want to run faster than anyone and I don't need to be an awesome cook. I will not be jealous of my well-read friend's library and I will not try to be the best Excel number-cruncher (though I'm pretty damn good at it already.) What I will be, is the best me. I no longer want to be the best at anything and everything. If that means I get a B in Accounting while making more time for my wife and pets because that's what matters more, that is how it shall be. If it means my website gets fewer hits because I'd rather be sitting outside staring at the moon instead of computer code, so be it.

Throughout our lives we have been taught that it is a great thing to be good at something and success is what we should strive for. Society puts a great deal of value on the champions in every field. You cannot fight these uncontrollable urges to be better at everything unless you are consciously aware of your true desires in a given field. From the bottom of my heart, I do not care about running a mile in under six minutes. I never have and never will. However, the moment I see someone dart past me at a park, an annoying little bulb lights up in my head and commands me to "wake up early every morning and start running again so you can be fast like this runner." So I wake up the next morning, run for a few days or weeks if I'm lucky, and then give up. Why? Not because I hate waking up early or despise running, but because running is not something I genuinely want to do at this point in my life.

The simple reason most of our resolutions fail is because we don't want to do them. And on top of that, we are told that we are utter failures if we don't stick to our resolutions and plans - plans that we never even wanted to make to begin with. So this is where we are right now. We make our own dreams but get sidetracked when we get stressed in our day-to-day life and see others succeeding at their own goals. So instead of working on our goals, we pick up their goals because self-help books and self-titled gurus said so. We try hard but fail after we realize we don't really like bending over backwards in yoga or rock-climbing. Then finally we ask ourselves what happened to our goals and why life seems so stressful and joyless despite our every effort at improving things.

I learnt all of this over time after trying to do too many things too fervently and failing miserably at almost all of them. I still hope to do a lot of things but only ones that I really, really want to do and without trying too hard to succeed in most of them. The handful of things that I am passionate about and dedicated to, will still get my full attention but the rest of the things on my todo list will get sort-of done, whenever, if ever. By not caring too much about everything, I am able to care a lot more about some specific things and that I feel is the key to reducing stress and reaching one's personal goals.

I've been studying for four hours now. Juliet's working on her exam material behind me too. Yesterday we kayaked up and down the Ichetucknee Springs and later went to Gainesville to see Jessica, Andrew, and my godson Jackson. There's a lot going on in our lives right now, the details of which are irrelevant. What is interesting is how much of a change it is compared to just a few months ago.

I started this year with a very simple life. I had launched the new database system at work finally and had absolutely no major plans in my personal life. The tasks at my job were complex in nature, however, relatively stress-free. At home, it was just me and the kitties. I didn't have any other work or large projects to deal with. I could go kayaking every weekend and relax every evening. Fast-forward eight-months later and I find myself split between four different lives. I have a pretty busy life at home with Juliet and nine of our pets. Now I have a lot more responsibilities at my work as our company grows. Outside of work, Sched has taken a life of it's own and there's so much to be done for Chime.TV too. To top it all off, my masters program demands at least 35 hours a week including driving to and from Tampa, three classes, team projects, research, exams, and tons of reading material.

I pine for days when I can sit back and write whatever comes to my mind but I think those days will, for the next two years, be hard to come by. It's back to studying now.

My glasses broke. I had a feeling they were going to break so earlier this week I had my eyes tested and ordered a new pair. My last eye exam was almost five years ago and thankfully my eyes haven't got any worse since. My single pair of glasses lasted so long that I forgot that glasses break. However, the new pair of glasses won't be ready till Tuesday. This means I have three full days of work without my glasses. I was kind of hoping that my old glasses would last at least a week longer so when I have the new pair, I could keep swapping them with the old one all day and confuse the hell out of everyone at work. Oh well, time to change all screens from 1280x1024 to 800x600.

Yet another weekend I spent having too much fun. Went to camp out on the Carolina Beach with my cousin Priya and a bunch of her friends. Lots of little stories and many more memorable incidents. On the drive back, I stopped by the historic city of Savannah, Georgia and had dinner with my friend Vu, whom I hadn't seen in a couple of years. He still looks exactly 19 years old though he's closer to 25. Thanks for the dinner!

The drive was pretty long and that's what this 'blog entry today is about. No, not long automotive drives, but "drive" - the drive to do what you always wanted. To me, it is more of an ongoing realization than an instantaneous epiphany. I've learnt over time that the cheesy Nike slogan is really true, "Just do it." No matter what it is, don't overthink, don't overanalyze. If it looks fun and interesting, go for it. Yes, everything has its fair share of positives and negatives. You can spend an entire lifetime meticulously weighing-in whether Grad School A is better than Grad School B or Grad School C (just for future reference, C is better, ALWAYS.) At the end of it all, it doesn't really matter a big deal.

Take a cosmic look at it. There are black holes, quasars, white dwarfs, spiral galaxies, and planetary nebulae. There are asteroids hurtling down space at a hundred thousand miles an hour. There are thunderstorms on Jupiter large than the entire Earth. There's the Andromeda galaxy slowly (relatively speaking (no pun intended)) entwining with the Milky Way. And then there's you, wondering if you should pretend to work for two more hours instead of going to see the standup comedian you always wanted to see. I speak from personal experience here. I don't know or care anymore which exam I was really studying for but I know I gave away tickets to Dave Chapelle's standup at my college back in Jersey. The worst experience in life is the one you didn't have.

I wouldn't say that I'm an active participant in the cult of Hedonism but I've learnt over the course of years that I cannot give up on the things I've always wanted to do just because "real" life is getting in the way. I have to make time. I have to give up some of my future to ensure my past continues to be free of regrets. Like they say, on the death-bed, nobody wishes they had spent more time at their desk job. We will wish that we had "lived" a little more. The unit of measurement of life is "This one time in...", not years.

With that desire in mind, earlier this summer I planned that I wanted to visit Taylor in Gainesville, Megan in Philly, Priya in North Carolina, Vu in Savannah, Chris in Tennessee, and Becky + Laura in Seattle. I'm over half way done, having had more than a few drinks with Taylor, dancing more than a mongoose with Megan, driving more than a trucker to see Priya, and talking more than a wacky morning DJ with Vu. Due to some change of plans, I'm not sure if I'm going to see Chris this year or whether Seattle is possible this summer, but you can bet your house on the fact that if there is even a slight chance, I'll take it. I'll take it and I'll write about it.

Tomorrow is my graduation ceremony. I'm so nervous. I know all that's gonna happen is that I'm gonna get my diploma but I feel like this is my biggest final exam ever.

Song for the day: "Upside Down" - Barenaked Ladies

I AM OFFICIALLY DONE WITH COLLEGE :) Just took my last exam (really really bad but who cares, it's all over!) Arthur's coming over to chill with me in a few. I gotta do my laundry then tonight we go to his girlfriend's house. I've never met her so it's gonna be interesting. Wooooohooooooooooooo college is OVER!!! WOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOO :)

Of course, I'm gonna do an MBA and then a PhD in Comp Sci eventually - no matter what!

I leave for the airport in a few hours. Without a car it's a long way to JFK Airport, NYC. Basically I gotta take the NJ Transit train from New Brunswick to Penn Station NYC. Then take Long Island Rail Road to Jamaica station. Finally take the AirTrain to JFK. Probably gonna cost me $50 just on the commute to and from airport. My flight's at 6:55 pm so I better leave by 1pm to be safe.

I have an exam on Monday that I haven't studied for at all. Will try to read on the flight or most probably on the return flight. Got my interview with my client on Saturday. Both of us are hoping that I join them so at the moment odds are in my favor. But let's not be too sure. His is a small but growing company that doesn't have a specific need for a software developer at the moment. However he's a forward-thinking man and told me he'll definitely have work for me in 6-7 months, just about the time I intend to join him. So everything looks good.

Wish me luck!

Waking up early morning and 'blogging seems too comfortable. I don't have to think about what I want to write or wonder if I really have the time for it. Yes I do. It's 7:15am and my world is just waking up so I have enough time. I hope I go to bed early everynight to wake up this time everyday. At least I had a night of peaceful sleep. Weird (but not bad) dreams though. Also the exam yesterday was quite bad. Let's see where my grades end up.

The main thing going on right now is my Florida trip. One of my clients asked me to work for him and he wants to sponsor me with a work permit etc. He has a small but growing company and is in the process of selecting his management team. If I join, I am hopefully going to become the CTO (Chief Technology Officer) when the company makes it big. After seeing his enthusiasm and hopefulness, I feel working independently for a small firm in Florida is better than slaving away under a behemoth in NYC. And to say the least, the beaches are hot! I am flying down to Florida on 9th April and returning back on 11th. I'll stay over at my buddy Taylor's place and we'll go to Universal Studios, time-permitting. The all-day interview will be on April 10th and if things go well, I will be joining them in early 2005.

If I do move to Florida, a lot of major changes will happen in my life. First of all, I'll be alone for the second time in my life. Here in Jersey I always have my family. The only three people I somewhat know in Florida (via the Web) are Tay, Derek, and my client. My non-work plans are pretty big once I'm there. Eventually I intend to live somewhere between work and University of Florida. I will try to get into a CS Grad program at UF and wi'll be driving 100's of miles each day from home to work and school. But within two years I should get my Masters. Also I might go for an MBA as it will definitely help out with my work. The time I will have for myself will be the weekends when I will take my car (of course) and drive all over everywhere. That is the thing I'm most excited about - freedom from a suffocating existence of being stuck in just one place (hint: 4 years in New Brunswick, New Jersey).

While Chime will never die, things will most probably slow down on the web-front, especially since I will be working for my largest client so that part of work will be moved into my 9-5 schedule. Best of all, once I get my work permit/visa, I can become the legal owner of Chime Softwares Ltd., instead of my aunt. As always, if things work out as planned, I could be making more than enough within two years and will be able to tell my dad to take a break even BEFORE July 10th 2007 (his predetermined date of retirement).

Another thing that'll happen is that I would be able to go to India at least twice a year! I could end up being one of those rich successful young entreprenuers! But then again, the 9-5 job I'm seeking isn't all that glamorous though it's in the glamour industry - making tanning products. Who said Indians can't do EVERYTHING! It'll be quite funny if I'm the only Indian guy in all of their gatherings. Everybody's gonna be like: What's HE doing here! He already HAS the perfect tan :) Go Desis!

Anyways, it will be a slow, slightly routine-ridden job I think but I hope to make it unböring somehow. I'll try NOT to postpone my graduate studies because everyone knows once you get on to the career path, it's impossilbe to get back into studies. So I'll make sure that doesn't happen to me. I want my PhD eventually as always.

I don't know where life's gonna take me next but I'm sure it'll be somewhere good. It might get lonely but then I'm always good at making new friends and since I'll have the time, I'll find some fun activities to do. Only bad thing about Florida is the heat. But I'll manage. Or not. But I'll deal I'm sure. Who knows, once I have a home, car, and a good job, I might want to settle down too! Nothing's sure though except that if I get this job, my 'blog entries will be slightly more interesting.

I feel powerless everytime I realize that the major success and failures of my life rely on the performance of a $100 CPU chip. Months of hardwork end up eliciting nothing more than a few chuckles from the audience when things don't go as planned.

I feel extremely uncomfortable saying this but last night's presentation of my research to my professor didn't go well at all. To put it midly, Titanic was a success compared to my blasted Java code. For some reason, both the computers I tested my demo on couldn't play the sound. My professor wasn't impressed and neither were the 5-6 PhD students who he asked to review my research. Took me only a few seconds to realize what a miserable failure I was too.

Then I came home, instead of studying for the exam that I have in 4 hours, I spent a good amount of time just relaxing, trying not to think about proceedings of the night. I realized a lot of things often go wrong in life. Optimism and pessimism aside, failure is determined not only by the outcome of the event but also the amount of time we spend moping on the results. So yes, things absolutely blew up in my face with regards to my research and while my professor is not angry at me, he sure is extremely disappointed. However, he was very VERY encouraging and told me to continue on to the next step in my research: writing a thesis paper describing my algorithm. Despite the fact that my current model doesn't work, he wants me to sit down and clearly write what I did, so that he has a better understanding of my methods.

After some yummy dinner last night, I realized what exactly was screwing up my demo and removed that module from my code. I rewrote a few lines to realize there IS a way I can make my code work everywhere! I now know what I have to do and tonight I shall do it. By God I will do it :) And you will see it and play it even on the slowest of the computers!

Had an economics exam today. Went pretty well. Went over to Busch Dining Hall with Michele for (FREE!) early dinner.

Sitting around the table talking to some frat guys she knew, I realized something very strange. Everyone I saw in every direction was 19 years old. Or at most 20. Four years in school. For some reason instead of feeling like a stalwart academic veteran, I felt more like an aging hippy who never moved out of the college campus after graduating 12 years ago. All of a sudden, I feel at 23, I am too old for Economics 301. I did start college late, so obviously not a big surprise that I graduate at a higher age. I don't know why I even notice the age difference so much, as it shouldn't really affect me. My friends are just 2-3 years younger than me and they certainly don't treat me like some old guy.

Bah I should just stop worrying and get on with the tons of work I have this weekend.

I just spent about $500 in one night of reckless online shopping :) I figured since I hadn't bought myself anything for my b'day, I could use a few New Years gifts. I sure hope everything arrives in a week or two. First of all, I bought 4, and yes I said FOUR Seagate Barracuda 120 GB hard drives for about $283. That's less than 60 cents per raw GB! I remember in 1998, I paid over $200 for just TWO GBs! I sure hope CDW honors this awesome deal. So I'll use these four 120GB hard drives and create a RAID 5 setup that will give me about 360GB of space using RocketRaid 1640 Serial ATA controller that cost me $90. RAID is basically a system of connecting two or more hard drives in such a way that if one of them fails, the others can recreate the data on the failed hard drive and thus manage to recover all your lost data. The cost is of course that 1/4th of the space used for backups. RAID also stores parts of each file into multiple hard drives at the same time, so that when you read the file back, it actually reads from multiple drives, which is obviously faster. Kind of like having more lanes on a highway - it's expensive, but works great. So now RAID 5 will combine these 4 hard drives and give me one big hard drive of approximately 360GB that will protect my data no matter what :) Plus it'll be two-to-three times faster than each of the drives individually.

Next, I bought a $1 microphone because I have no idea where my old one is and on top of that bought this gorgeous A4Tech RP-649 wireless optical mouse for only $33. This mouse has two scroll wheels, five configurable buttons, works from a distance of 5-6 feet, comes with 4 recharable batteries, AND includes a two-battery recharger! That's a LOT for the price. And finally, I bought a pair of Sennheiser HDC451 noise-cancellation headphones. Sennheiser makes one of the best speaker-systems & headphones. These headphones are normally priced at $150 but they were only $70 on Amazon! Noise-cancellation means just that - once I wear these headphones and turn them on, they basically cancel almost all of the surrounding noise :) So I can sit in the noisy buses, turn these on, and listen to my music as if the whole world is quiet and peaceful :)

So let's see: $284 HDD + $90 RAID + $1 Mic + $33 Mouse + $70 Headphones + $16 Shipping/Tax = $494. I think these are enough gadgets for me for now. Hehe. Oh and I still have an Econ exam left. It's in about 7 hours, so I better go to sleep soon! I <3 my gadgets and gizmos.

Econ paper done. Two exams to go. One tonight, one Friday. Two weeks of vacation after that (during which I'll mostly be preparing for grad school etc.) Gotta study for tonight's exam now...

One exam done (Operating Systems). Three more to go and one final paper to complete. After that, I got to make a few minor updates a couple of client sites and then continue working on my main project for the next few months. Rest all's going good I guess.

Took me about 34 - 8 = 26 hours to complete my final project for computer graphics. I'm quite satisfied with the results. Will post a few screenshots here later. I have Econ assigments due Monday and Tuesday and a comp sci homework due Tuesday. After that, gonna study non-stop for my GRE Comp Sci subject test - exam on Dec 13. This is one of those really big exams that will probably decide the course of my life. Much more strongly than all the graphics projects, all my web sites, and all the studies I've been doing in college. So I am gonna try really hard to do well in it.

What a long boring day. Had my econ exam. Prolly did good. Went to a meeting for potential grad students. It scared the hell out of me. I'm gonna have to do a LOT of things now if I want to get into a decent grad school.

Early this morning, i had fresh bagel and cream cheese for breakfast while watching new episodes of South Park. And then I went to bed. Just woke up. Have an exam tomorrow, so gotta study now.

Sometimes things go so fast. I had my CS Graphics exam, told the professor that I wish to work as his research assistant next semester and that I'm applying for Grad school next year. Also signed up for GRE Computer Science subject test (Dec 13. is the test). At the moment, top schools on my list: Rutgers, Princeton, MIT, and NYU. I'll probably apply to a few more schools in NJ/NY and Boston area. Let's see. Ideally I would just like to keep my current job, get into grad school and pay for it myself, instead of becoming just another Teaching Assistant (TA). However, if I get to be a Research Assistant (RA) for some professor, that would rock, cuz then my tuition would be free and I'd get $1500 a month for living expenses (which is better than my current status - since I'm paying a hell lot for tuition).

But I live cheaply anyway, so I don't care about the money at the moment. I just want to get into a good grad school and see where it leads me. Damn can't believe it's Nov. 2003 already and I'm applying to grad schools. Huh. Oh well, got 2 projects due this week and one major one due on Monday. Gotta get back to that (and lotsa client work too!)

Got 87/100 in my Comp Sci (314) exam, didn't do as good as I expected but eh it's good enuf for now. Got another CS exam tomorrow, Graphics, that I am really scared of. It's pretty damn difficult. I really hope I don't screw up this one. Have a bad headache (more like a neck/spinal pain) I think due to long nights. Don't feel too good right now but I think things will get better by Thursday. Plus the weather's real dull too. Urgh.

OS exam went decent. I know I did one part wrong but it's not the worst that could happen. Definitely expecting a high B or B+ and high hopes for an A. Let's see wha happens. Got lotsa studying to do right now.

I joined this site & install their software called What Pulse that basically counts the number of keys I type. Every hour or so, it updates the stats page and tells everyone how I'm doing. So far, I'm already within the top 1000 people. But I don't think it is something that I'm gonna brag about at the club next week.

Yeah, I'm prolly going clubbin or somethin in a week or two. Haven't been out in a while... Let's see. Got CS OS exam tomorrow and have to do homework for Econ class. No rest for me. Worked on a lotta sites last night. Still have so many things to do...

Got my CS Principles of Programming Languages exam tonight. Studied all night, literally, with Linda and still not sure if I know everything. She was more worried than me and kept saying that I know 10 times more than anyone else in the class. I'm not too sure. Damn CFGs and FSAs. Be glad you don't have to worry about them every day (well unless you're a CS major too).

Got lotsa stuff planned this week. More work tonight and tomorrow. Hopefully gonna go see Kill Bill on Thursday. Working and studies all weekend. This is the busy time of the semester. But then things will only get worse. Can't wait till December. I dunno where I wanna go this year but I should really start planning. Prolly California. It'll be nice in the winter. I have a friend there (Peter - my partner in OYC venture) and Jenny the cuteness. Anyone have a few hundred thousand extra miles for a poor little lost boy from Calcutta? Hehe. Ok shower now and gotta head to work.

In advanced econometrics exam that I said I did bad in, well I did. I got 78/100. Typically that's a C+. However, everyone else did SO bad that 78 is an A :) So despite doing so bad, I got an A! Yay!

In my computer graphics class right now. Had a bad Advanced Econometrics exam. I hope I get at least a B though. And 3-4 hours of studies more tonight. Hope we can get it done sooner.

Three Al Pacino movies in three days - The Godfather, Scarface, and Scent of a Woman. Wow. I need to see a few comedy films to get unserious. Ah. Exam tomorrow. Watched TV all day. Obviously, you can see I got my priorities straight. Hehe.

I don't EVER remember being THIS tired. I have been programming non-stop for 23 hours now, with 3 hours of sleep. However, I can say I FINALLY did my computer graphics project. I have never EVER studied so much for just one class/project. I think I already spent 55-60 hours behind this project! Got a bad headache right now, but gotta study more - Advanced Econometrics exam tomorrow. It's ok, I'll survive. I'm just too damn tired to even whine.

It's a creepy feeling. I can't believe I'm actually experiencing this long lost emotion. For the first time in years, I am extremely bored. I've been watching TV all this week after my exam ended. I've watched tens of episodes of Family Guy, hours of standup comedy on Comedy Central, and listened to music till I got tired. If you noticed, I didn't mention computers because I'm giving myself a mental break.

So now even though I have whole two weeks of free time to do as much work as I want to, I am gonna relax a bit and not work 24/7. I owe that to myself. And now all of a sudden I find out, I am a normal human too; who gets bored, wants to go and meet people, do stuff. Of course I can't do anything cuz sadly NONE of my friends are on campus (or close by), my family's in Bahamas, I can't go meet any of my far away friends cuz the trains/subways aren't really working, AND I have no money! Since the ATM machines around my area are down, and credit-cards are not working (because all of these rely on databases centered in NYC), I am literally stuck here. I've enough food to last me one month, but my point is, I wanna go out and do something. No money, no car, no train = no fun. Hmmm. Oh well, this STILL beats having 3 project dues and 2 exams. Hehe. So life is good. Except it's weird. Cuz as I said, I haven't been bored in a LONG time.

Exam over. Was quite well. Not as good as the midterm but I thoroughly expect an A in this course. Tired now. Sleep time.

Been working + studying hard lately. Nothing interesting happening, unless you think Gaussian Quadrature is interesting. Math exam tonight. My two week vacation starts 9 pm tonight. In my dictionary, vacation simply means no school. I still have to work full-time every day and make websites all nights, but at least no more exams and homework for a couple of weeks.

Blog time! Two things about me tonight - my intelligence and my stupidity, not in the same order. Let's begin with your favorite topic - my lack of common sense. So I come home after work and it's kinda drizzling. I get ready for class and step outside and the rain has begun. The bus stop is 5 mins away from my home and yet somehow I decide it's not that bad and just keep walking. I could have simply turned around, walked into my room, and got my raincoat, but it just didn't occur to me. The only thing I could think of was how long could I stand under some tree/roof before I missed my bus. So I walk down Stone St., getting wet by the second when all of a sudden it starts pouring. Even under the trees I was getting soaked. Then I saw my bus move across the street and ran up to catch it, getting my jeans drenched in the process. I walk into the bus and everybody just stares @ me like I'm an alien. I guess I was, considering everyone inside was dry and calm while I was soaked and panting.

As I stood here, trying to dry myself, I kept wondering why I was the only one who was so wet, cuz it was raining so hard. Then it hit me, I was the only one without a raincoat/umbrella! Ya, so I'm plain dumb. What can I say. Sometimes the most common things just don't come to me. When I see rain, I don't think of umbrella, I think of either enjoying being soaked or running really fast to get to wherever I wanna be. I went to my math class and had to change into my gym clothes. So there I was, in my shorts and jersey while everyone was in casuals/work-clothes. My teacher looked funny @ me, especially when he saw that I was drying my jeans and wet t-shirt on the desk in front of me. Hehe. Sometimes I just forget that I live in a world full of "people" who actually notice how oddly I behave. Eh! Who cares.

Now on to some good stuff. My work's been going great. In fact so great that I'm rejecting large projects every other day. I've just rejected two websites each worth $5000 simply because I want to study hard starting September and not just work day/night. Anyways, I'm now gonna be involved in 3 projects - OnYourCell, GuptaMedia, and consulting with a friend of mine. If things work out, who knows... Also I'm slowly realizing that my skills are really in demand at the moment. Not to be immodest but I'm quite smart when it comes to computers and what most programmers take weeks to do, I can do in days and sometimes hours. As a result, people who've seen my work, instantly realize I'm too good to miss. So I get more and more work. However, I'm seriously losing interest now. I need a break. I don't really NEED all the money either. What I need is peace of mind. And some good quality time with myself - doing nothing, just watching TV, reading a book, and sleeping.

Next week's my math exam. So this weekend I'm gonna study non-stop. Might go home on Friday, not sure. Eh I got nothing more to say.

So I did do well in my math exam - 100% - perfect score :) Of course this was only the midterm and lots of homework and final exams are still left. Finals in 2 weeks. Lots of homework to do right now. G'nite...

For once I can say I had a good exam - Midterm for Numerical Analysis. There were 6 questions and as far as I can tell, I got most of the stuff right. Maybe there was a tiny +/- error here and there, but overall I felt good as I left the class. I better get an A :-P

Econ final exam wasn't as good as I expected. Lotta weird questions :( Hmmm.... Hope I still get an A.

Me hungry! It seems all I want these days is to sleep and eat! Phew at least I'm still human. Oh and last night's Econ exam was decent. I better get an A in that! Otherwise I'll be real mad @ myself. Art came over to my bunker after the exam and I introduced him to the fine cuisine of the little chinese food place two houses down - "Panda House" - Veg Chow Mein @ its best :)

It's funny how, when you are trying to save money, all the advice you get is about spending more money. I asked Bruce 'n Tamara where I could get a bag of potatoes. I forgot to stress that I wanted to make my own baked-potato in the microwave to save some $$$ every now and then. Bruce said they have a good market down on Route 18. I complained that the problem is, I don't have a car so it'll take me 2 hours to walk there! "Why not buy a car?" said Bruce. Tamara's like "Cuz his insurance would be twice the cost of the car." Bruce suggested, "Go buy a moped. It's really cheap. The insurance will be a coupla hundred bucks at most." I'm getting confused, "But I can't ride a moped. I dunno how!" Getting surprised, Bruce said, "Anyone can ride a moped man! It's so easy..." And Nick (my work buddy) cautioned that "You can't really drive a moped on Route 18" to which Tamara suggested, "Ya but there's alternative routes. Will take ya a bit longer though..."

So then for a moment I began to consider how I'll buy a moped, where I'll park it, how I'll pay the insurance, how I'll figure out the alternative ways to get to Route 18... and then it strikes me - I JUST WANT A BAG OF POTATOES! I don't want a car or a moped! So I said, "Guys... I'm trying to save some small money by making my own baked-potatoes rather than paying $1 everyday to Wendy's and you're suggesting I spend even more for a moped!" Bruce said, "Well you should've said that before!" *sigh* My bad. I should've. Finally Tamara said that there's a good market down on Hamilton Street and would be a 10-15 minute walk once a week. I think I can handle that.

What worries me though, is that for a moment there, I was actually contemplating buying a moped and wondering how I'll talk my landlord into letting me park for free. If I was actually 'intelligent', I would've made sure to tell them beforehand about the main reason I want the potatoes - saving moolah. Just goes to show you that I'm not really as smart as I always pretend to be :) If you see me in my Econ class, you'll prolly assume that I'm some smartass who knows everything and will get highest grades in every exam. Prolly far from truth. I'm just a 22 yr old big dumb kid who wants his bag of potatoes. That's it...

I dunno if I mentioned this but last week I bought a new shaver. I have now a shaver and a trimmer by Conair. Have to admit it, after trying a number of different products, I've come to the simple conclusion that Conair is a totally awesome company. I shaved last night @ 6pm (after getting the most expensive haircut ever - $18 - ya I was stupid - next time I'm going back to my $8 guy). It's over 14 hours now and not even minor stubble. I can finally go two days without shaving now and not look like a grizzly :)

Got econ exam tonight. Kinda worried since I don't have the book yet (it's in the mail) and the course material is pretty hard. Gonna do all my studying online on G. Lotsa stuff to do @ my work too.

I AM FREEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!! Exam over!!!!!! I am soooooooooooo happy :) Had last celebration dinner w/ Mich @ Burger King. TV and relaxation now. Got work @ 8 am tomorrow though. So can't stay up too late. Physics exam was ok. I'm really hoping I get an A in that class. There is a chance of B+ but right now I don't really care. I'm just glad it's all over.

If I don't wake up tomorrow, then PLEASE call the cops and report the following person - Arthur Baczyk. He is 6 foot tall, Caucasian with short hair and glasses. I just found out that I got an A IN MY COMPUTER CLASS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Arthur is in the same class and awaiting his grades. He's in my room right now studying Linear Algebra for his exam tomorrow. After seeing me jump up and dance like a madman (upon receiving my professor's email regarding the grade) he gave me a very weird *look* - you know, the one full of envy, spite, and jealousy!!! So ya, I gotta be REALLY careful of him tonight.

HAHA! Just kiddin'! He's my bud :) He has another exam tomorrow - Physics, same as me. He's done with the Physics and I'm just starting. I dunno how to continue studying - I mean I'm just sooooooooo damn excited with my A in CS and 99% probability A in Econ. Of course, there's still my potential B in Math and B+ in Trauma & Literature :( And I do have to study for my Physics if I wanna get an A in that class. But anyways... I'm EXTREMELY elated right now :) Now back to studying!

I just gave the BEST EXAM EVER! As far as I know, I got all the five questions perfectly correct - Econometrics rulez! I'm taking Advanced Econometrics in Fall '03, though it's not gonna be as easy as this. Anyways, I'm in a REALLY good mood right now. Gotta study for Physics tonight. Hopefully it'll be good too.

Anyways, there's a LOTTA good movies coming out this summer. One of the movies I really wanna see is Finding Nemo. Actually it's a cartoon, but still. I love Pixar products :) God I sound like a 7 year old. Actually Cigir told me the other day that she thought I was younger than her. Like I was 20-21 or something. Hehe. It's funny to me cuz back in India, everyone said I looked 25 or somethin! So looks like I've got younger with time. Hehe.

Got my econometrics exam in 3 hours - REALLY scared. Let's hope it's better than my past two exams. Been studyin all morning. Can't even afford a 5 min break. Listenin to a good song:

Song for the day: "Peacekeeper" - Fleetwood Mac

Happy Mother's Day!!! Too bad I gotta study all day for my finals :( On top of that I have an extremely bad headache. Urgh. Econ exam tomorrow. Saddest thing is my aunt, uncle, and cuzins are all going to Bombay Bistro (really good Indian restaurant 5 mins from where I live) and I have to sit here and study :(

In a world going wrong, at least something went right finally - I got Optimum Online cable internet in my new place! I didn't buy the TV package, since well, it's all too expensive. Each month I'm paying $500 rent, $50 for my cellphone, $50 for internet, $150-200 approx. for food. So there goes $800 a month on just basic survival. Of course I need to pay for my college also. But no worries. Here's why:

"Hi. This is Chirag. If you are the phone company, I already sent the money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my financial-aid institution, you didn't lend me enough money. If you are my friends, you owe me money. If you are a pretty female, don't worry, I have plenty of money."

Anyways, here's my moving status: After my last exam on 13th, I'll slowly start moving my stuff. Hopefully by 18th (next Sunday) I should be all set in my new place. Life is easy and smooth from then on. Gonna go to my cuzins' dance show tonight and also next Saturday. I really can't wait till Econ & Physics exams are over. I'm not getting all A's this semester - mostly A's and B+. Let's hope I don't get a C+ or B in any class, since I know my computer and math exams didn't go as well as I prepared for them. Overall, I'm more than glad this semeste's coming to an end.

After studying consistently for days and weeks, I totally messed up on the computer finals :( Not feeling good at all. Got another exam (Math) in 4 hours. Urghhh... God when will this be over...

And another day comes to an end. It was a decent day I guess. Had lunch @ Subway with Manzinder :) It was good! I hadn't talked to her in a while. Chilled w/ Kat @ Arc building for half an hour and went to my math class. Well instead of the grade C that I expected in the exam, I got a B. Not that bad I guess. I'm hoping for a B in this course now. And then Rita (no, NOT my dear aunt from Bombay), but my friend from Math class, gave me a ride from Busch campus to College Avenue in her unbelievably clean (for a college student) Audi (I'm pretty sure it was an A4). Then had my literature class and got back home just in time for South Park & Dave Chapelle Show on Comedy Central.

I'm not in my room @ all lately. Busy with studies and stuff. So anyways, I had my LAST physics lab EVER today! That was my last class with Michele ever :( Gonna miss it. And the math exam today was 'eh'! I think I'll get a C in this class (if I'm LUCKY!) And after the math exam, Cher took me to see a really good movie @ Milledoler Hall - Alfred Hitchcock's 1958 classic - Vertigo. REALLY awesome movie. I've been submitting two of my progs to tons of random internet sites since 2 hours - Hot Chime & Chime Away! Let's hope I get some good traffic. It's been a LOOOOOONG time since I got some popularity online.

Spent ALL day in the student center studying math. Cher studied with me for 4-5 hours and will prolly study a few more hours tomorrow before the exam. I'm really scared. Oh well, it's bed-time for me now.

Google Easter Egg hunt :) You saw it here first!

Anyways, it had been a long time since I went to bed after sunrise, more specifically 6:30 am, AND woke up before noon, 11:30 am. That's quite an accomplishment for me! Well gotta go study my ass off now - Math exam tomorrow.

Today was a decent day. I was happy to get 20 + 20 in two of my Econ labs and REALLY sad to get only 78 in my comp sci exam :( Oh well, there's still the final and I think I'll cover up. Worked + studied all day.

The best part was after my Trauma & Literature class ended @ 9 pm. I went over to my friend Molly's place and we watched South Park together. Cartman as usual, saved the day. She's in the literature class with me. I had some good red wine (and am still kinda shaken from it) and went to this bar in New Brunswick called Doll's House. Was really cool meeting all her friends etc. over there. Met this REALLY funny Bengali guy with a large beer belly (no wonder!). I'm REALLY sleepy right now and headed straight for ze bed. G'nite world...

And I have invented clean clothes yet again! As I was doing my laundry, I kept trying to remember when was the last time I did it. Then I thought, oh well, I'll just check it out on my 'blog. Turns out, I didn't mention it last time on my 'blog. No I'll never find it... :(

Anyways, got Econ lab to do tonight. Tomorrow I'll finish up on readin' some books and prolly study Math on Sunday, for the exam on Wednesday.

My life is sooooo weird. So I didn't study enough for my Physics exam and expected to get 60-70% in the exam I gave on Tuesday. Imagine my surprise when I get 94/100 :) And the math quiz today - I didn't do that good, but I think I did better than my last two math quizzes. Let's see how I fare. Talked to my Econ professor today and he suggested a few good topics for my econ honors project. In the next few weeks I have one math exam, two books to read, one 6-8 page paper, two econ labs, three physics webassigns, and one computer science homework. Thankfully it's all spread apart and I'll be able to handle everything much better now. Also I need to catch up on Ms. Sleep ;)

I went home tonight and got my glasses back + some summer clothes. Spring's right around the corner (hopefully this Sunday will be bright and sunny and not too hot/cold.) My last week was really stressed out but things kinda look chilled henceforth... let's hope :)

Found a free site with lots of good lyrics. Like here are the lyrics of pretty much all of Pink Floyd songs. And here's one of my all-time favorites - Ironic by Alanis :)

Been workin' all day. Physics exam this morning was bleh - nothing to feel proud of. Gotta do Econ + Literature all night tonight. Will prolly go to aunt's home tomorrow night - forgot my glasses there. It's kinda hard to program for 6 hours without your glasses :(

Just when I thought things couldn't get worse, they actually didn't. For once, weather's in my favor - Math class cancelled cuz of the snow :) Yippee Yay! Now I can go study for my Physics exam tomorrow. But wait, this means the Math quiz is now on Wednesday, meaning, I have THREE things on the same day again! Urgh... Oh well, no need to worry about anything till Tuesday midnight :)

So anyways, haven't blogged in length. So tonight's the night. Today was pretty standard - some major network chaos @ work, usual asp/access programming, a good veggie sub sandwich for dinner and here I am working yet again on my Econometrics lab. Yes! The nightmare's back. I started my last lab on last Thursday night and it took non-stop work until this Tuesday midnight to complete it. And as soon as I submitted it yesterday morning, the teacher assigned another lab due this Wednesday! Each frickin lab takes 18-24 hours if you work non-stop! I am not even joking right now. On top of that I have big math quiz on Monday, Physics exam on Tuesday, two novels to read + paper to write by Wednesday for Literature class, and of course this Econ lab due on Wednesday. Of course I have 3 websites to work on! Arghhhhhhh! No more sleep for me :( I just want to get over with this Econ and Literature classes. Ahhhhhh someday... about 40-45 days from now... Can't wait...

Anyways, last night was pretty cool. Two things - first, all of us from our Trauma & Literature class went to hear the famed author Chang-rae Lee in the Rutgers Student Center read the first chapter of his next book. We're reading one of his most acclaimed novels, A Gesture Life in this class. He's a quite inspiring author and was just so young and normal looking, that it was hard to imagine that he wrote such marvellous books. That's the best thing about artists - they don't always have to 'look' like artists. So I still have to finish the book and then I have to start reading A Thousand Acres. Or I could just see the movie to save time ;)

I left mid-way though and went to the Economics Honors seminar cuz it was sadly @ the exact same time as the book reading. I did get the gist of the program though - I have to pick a topic in Economics, find a professor who would be willing to be my advisor, register for the honors program, and then go ahead and start with the real research. I came back home last night @ past 11pm! Was a looooong day - 10am - 11pm :(

I'm still tired right now. Haven't got enuf sleep either. Unless I get enuf rest soon, I'm gonna collapse :( Oh well, I don't have time to sleep right now - gotta do the Econ lab... oh well...

Alright after looking @ how bad it's gonna rain this weekend in NYC, plan called off. Prolly a movie around here somewhere I think.

And here's my new fav. comic - Diesel Sweeties :) What is weird though, is that I ALWAYS find a new good comic right before a big exam!

Working hard all day today *tsk tsk*. Had lunch with my awesome buddy Mason. He's a big Fark/HomestarRunner/StrongBad fan! That's like my twin! Only 6 inches taller and 100lbs heavier. Hehe. When I grow up, I wanna be like Mason. Hehe...

Anywayz been talking to Amanda online today. Long time no chat. Prolly gonna get dinner w/ Angie tonight. Studying all night for my CS exam tomorrow though. So no free time :( No party either. Gotta make my stdy schedule for Fall 2003 and pick all the imp. classes. Ahhhhh. And I gotta pay $3500 before May 8th for summer classes. Right now I only have like $1500. Cash advances anyone? Ok back to work.

Soon March will end and April will start. How time flies...

I got my Econometrics exam back. I did pretty well -> 90% = A :) It's not the highest in the class, but I think @ the moment I really don't care about getting the highest in all my classes, mainly cuz of the 1000 other things I've got on my head right now. Just talked to 3 of my clients this morning. I have 3 big sites to finish up before summer :)

I'm thinking of taking a web-site break this summer though - I need a breather. I'll probably work on my 'blog + main site and maintain my existing clients' sites, but no more. Plus I'll hopefully be busy all summer with my next project - On Your Cell.com (OYC). I don't know if I mentioned this before, but I'm gonna work with my friend Peter, who's in California right now. He's formed a subsidiary of Chime Softwares Ltd, NJ called Chime Softwares West and we will create WAP/HDML sites under this corporation. That is websites for cellphones & other handhelds. Ya ya we all know how the dot.com bubble burst and what happened to those millionaire-wannabes who tried to shove the Internet into every crevasse of your body. Our site will be different and VERY simple. Suppose you find yourself in LA, and need to go to a good restaurant, simple surf to www.onyourcell.com on your cell, and select 'LA Restaurants' from the menu. Then select your city or enter your zipcode to get a list of all restaurants in the area. Of course you can then search for the cheapest Italian restaurants using your cell phone and find who sells the most variety of pasta. OYC won't be the greatest website ever, but I think with decent advertizing, we can get 100+ hits per day and that should be enough to persuade a lot of local LA restaurants to sign up with us. Let's see how it goes. Peter's a good friend of my cuzin Purvi and I met him a few years ago in NYC and this year again in Utah. He's gonna handle all the customer/client/marketing/advertizing issues and my job is to create the site, make it work, take care of the databases.

It'll be a welcome break from my Chime.Tv work, cuz right now I handle pretty much everything from sales to marketing to technical stuff all by myself. While it's great to have so much control over my business, it's not the best model for expansion. When I wanna make CSL big, I'll have to take over either management or tech - not both. For now, I'm doing both, but as soon as I find someone who can manage CSL better than me or is better @ creating websites than me, I'd be more than willing to divide and conquer :)

The econometrics exam was pretty good. Actually much better than I thought it would be. I guess all the hard studies yesterday paid off :) Got a long day ahead of me now (and a big paper to write in a day!)

Tonight's dinner with Kat brought a lot of sweet memories from childhood. One of her fav. toys was (obviously) She-Ra. And mine was He-man :) I sooo miss my He-man... I wanted to be all muscle-y and bicep-y when I grew up (of course I ended up scrawny and not so strong) Oh and we talked about Glowworms! How can anyone ever forget the Glowworms? Those were some good times... Tomorrow I have my first Econometrics mid-term exam. Please, can I please go back to being a child again? Sure, it's cool to be all grown up, but I miss my days of innocence.

Yeah, I was a child of the 80's. Those were some good years... 90's basically sucked, except that I found computers... But 80's... oh my... Just think of Dr. Fad in the Fad Show!!! He's back actually. Anyone remember that? I would watch that show every time it was on. And Beyond 2000. Well Beyond 2000 is a great website now, no TV show. Ahhh nostalgia... sweet nostalgia.

Had a looooong day today. Math exam was ok. Nothing to be proud of. I think I'm gonna get a B or C+ in this class :(

Watching Office Space yet again right now :)

Quote for the day "I did absolutely nothing, and it was everything I dreamed it could be." - Peter, Office Space

What do you get when you study 'Analysis of Complex Variables' (math) for over 9 hours? A very bad HEADACHE! The exam's tomorrow and I think I studied as much as I could without killing myself... VERY tired now. Had too much junk food @ the student center too. Not good... Urgh... but well that's the only thing I felt like eating, cuz I'm in no mood to eat a healthy salad or veggie-sub right now. Tired like anything... G'nite world...

Just wrote a paper titled The Philosophy of Trauma for my Trauma & Literature class. Writing the paper took me about 4 hours, however preparing my mind to write it, took over 6 hours, mainly because writing philosophical material, especially stuff that deals with words, meanings, knowledge, and conditions requires a lot of logical thinking. Phew! Glad I'm done with this paper though. Tomorrow I study for my math exam, then write another 3 page paper on Monday, then study for Econometrics on Tuesday. I think I should be free from Wednesday onwards :) Free, to make tons of new websites, bunch of new software, and hoardes of Spring Break fun! (Or so I dream...)

Today (actually yesterday, since I'm already 50 mins past midnight), was a good day :) I had a decent Physics exam, great time @ work (as usual), dinner with Kathleen, chilled with Michele at SERC, and went to see Lewis Black's standup comedy show on campus with my buddy Arthur. Just got home, did a little work, and about to head to bed. I still have to write a paper for a class, but I guess I'll make some time tomorrow. Otherwise I'm screwed.

Lewis Black... he said some real interesting things. Of course, the whole two hours were tummy-turning hilarious, but there was some stuff he said which was serious. Like he said, these college years, are the best in our lives. That's it, after college, we're all pretty much screwed, so we better make the best of our years here! Hmmm, so is this it huh? This is the best part of my life and things are just gonna get worse from here onwards? Well, I'm not saying things are bad right now, but I'm sure as hell hoping better things happen later. At least a car, decent place to live, some love in life? Hmmm... makes you wonder if being a single broke college kid with freedom but no wheels is better than being a rich entrepreneur with a flashy car and lovely wife... Makes you think... Hehe... I talk too much. Time to head to bed.

Oh where am I? I dunno. Been real busy this week with studies. Had Physics exam this morning. It went ok, nothing great. Math quiz yesterday was seriously bad. Tomorrow I have homework + process log due. Gotta start working on Econ lab soon. Ahh sooooo much to do. Anyways, taking a nice break tonight - Kath taking me to dinner and then going to a standup comedy show: Lewis Black Live in Rutgers! Yup! He's the new angry-old man, after George Carlin kinda mellowed down. No matter how much I curse Rutgers all the time, sometimes they do bring in great people :)

Take my Professor for 'Trauma and Literature' class, Dr. Martin J. Gliserman. He used to be the Editor-in-Chief of the American Imago Journal that publishes articles on psychoanalysis in contemporary cultural, literary, & social hisory. His class is probably the most intereting class I've ever taken (although I kinda get bogged down by the 10 novels I have to read during this semester). It's just amazing how much experience he has, from writings of Freud to history of literature, he pretty knows everything :) Yes, I know I sound like a teacher's pet right now, but I'm just being honest. He's indeed one of the best teachers I've ever had :)

Ok back to work!

I just read last year's blog (Feb 17, 2002) below and my my I have changed so much! I sleep more than enough these days :) Last night I went to bed at 5am and I woke up at 3pm! I eat a lot too. Hehe. I think it is probably just stress that turns me into a robot at certain times of the year (esp. during exam weeks). Glad to say I'm living large at the moment and totally enjoying life.

I have a few mins to talk about this now. Wanted to speak about it since I woke up. Yesterday, Cliff Wilson died in a car crash. I wouldn't have felt one bit of sympathy had he not been a farker - member of the Fark virtual community. I woke up this morning and read on the front-page of Fark: [sad] "Farker Kilipo4 dies in car accident" and saw the other farkers had posted over 200 comments. I skimmed the article and went to check out the comments section but after reading just the first few, I gave up.

All I could read were comments like: "This is sad. Sorry to hear it and I hope he's in a better place now. My sympathy to his family." I could have posted my sympathies to his family too. But for some reason, I did not feel like becoming a part of the grief. And I tried to ignore it. But it's kinda impossible to ignore the death of a member of a community about which you care so much. Most people who don't spend more than an hour a day online, will never realize how important these virtual communities are to the people who're online 8 hours a day. For me, a website like Fark is more than a bunch of html links and images. It is a congregation of like-minded people, people who don't live down my road, but still say 'hi' to me when I post an interesting comment.

And from Fark's grief, started this thread on another popular discussion site: Meta Filter. What moved me most, and prompted me to write this 'blog entry, was this:

What defines when we grieve? It's an odd question, but it's kind of relevant. 7 people die on a shuttle, and a nation grieves. 40 people die on a train and very few people notice. A girl dies in the playground and no one cares. A 'farker' who appears to have posted just twice dies, and an entire site seems to go into mourning. What controls our community and our sphere of mourning?

Yes, what defines when we grieve? Sometimes the death of a close relative doesn't make us as sad as a breakup in a relationship. Sometimes, forgetting my wrist-watch for a single day, agonizes me more than losing countless nights worth of sleep while studying for an exam.

Coincidences. They amaze me. Because this is EXACTLY what I wrote just last night in the Process Log - 02 for my Trauma and Literature class. I spent the better part of last night, pondering whether the sufferings of one differ from the sorrows of the other? In short, is your sorrow any worse than mine? If you are sad, are you any sadder than me? Do I have the right to question if your grief is superior or inferior to mine? Or more deserving of sympathy? While I didn't answer it in the log, I think not. Everybody has the same quality of happiness, sorrow, joys, and sadness in the world. Note, I said QUALITY and not QUANTITY. Someone may be unfortunate enough to get into a major car accident, rendering them disabled. And someone else might live up to the ripe age of 90 without even so a scratch. But does that automatically mean that the former victim, who might have a loving family to take care of him, has suffered more in his life, than the unscathed one that lived alone, unmarried, and lonely all his life? My point is: We are no one to judge. I guess this is akin to what I was saying a few weeks ago, in my incoherent babble, aptly titled: Chaos.

Anyways, I went on to read almost all of MetaFilter's comments, not because I was hoping to read a more analytical and sophisticated discussion on the topic (devoid of any sentimental statements that the Fark thread was full of), but mainly because I wanted to look at the incident, from an outsider's point-of-view. I, for some reason, did not want to let the sympathies of other farkers overcome my emotions and make me feel sad for Cliff too. I wanted to look inside, while being 100 miles outside.

Ahhhhhh the stuff this 'Trauma and Literature' class makes me think about. Don't worry though, I'm not gonna get depressed or anything. At the most, I'll become a little more social, humane, and loving :)

Today is the shortest day of the year - the Winter Solstice. Not that it's affecting me in any way, it's 2:40 and I'm still awake! Hehe. Actually I just woke up 4 hours ago. After my last exam today (Physics I) I came home and just went to bed from 3-11 pm!

I just finished watching Indecent Proposal. I had always heard that it was a good movie but this was the first time I actually got around to seeing it. And now I'm watching Dirty Work on USA Channel. Real funny movie. I remember seeing part of this movie once but I had to leave because of something else. But right now, I got all the time in the world to finish it :)

Anyways, my grandpa had a successful brain operation yesterday. There's a second operation in 2 days. My dad said it's nothing to worry about. So well I'm trying my best not to worry.

My grades are starting to come in. I got A in Physics Lab, Intmd. Micro Econ, Diff. Equations - Calc 4, and Comp. Discrete Structures. I will probably get A in Comp. Architecture. But the chances of gettin' an A in Physics are slim. Oh well, I'm just hoping for the best...

Ok, back to watching more TV :)

I'm studying for my economics exam right now.

My cuzin Keval just came online and told me that the IBM Research puzzle we solved together last week, has a list of people who answered it correctly, and our names are in there! Scroll to the bottom of this page till you see "Keval Mehta (12.14.2002@06:34:36PM EST)" and "Chirag Mehta (12.14.2002@06:34:36PM EST)". Well, next time we'll hopefully solve the puzzle on the first day itself. Hehe... And so our names would be on the TOP of the list rather than at the bottom. Ok back to Econ now.

While studying for my economics exam, I ran across this article by Ben Stein; a very thought provoking article that warns that unless US doesn't stop trying to be 'cool' and starts being 'smart', it's gonna end up in a real bad situation. It won't take long before Europe takes over US if things continue to get worse at the current rate. Real good article. Read it.

This article says that 20% of all accidents are caused by sleepy drivers. Well does that mean that we should ban driving who stay awake, because they cause 80% of the accidents? Hehe...

Anyways, I had my first exam this morning -Computer Science - Discrete Structures II. It went pretty well. I'm really hoping for an A in that class. I did good in the last exam and the homeworks too. Tomorrow I have economics. Gotta go study for that now :)

Sweetie, we need to talk! Hehe. Just kiddin! I mean, I feel like talking :) Aren't you glad? Hehe. So let's see what's happening in my life overall. First up, studies, exams, and college. Next week is gonna be hell, but I feel like I am decently prepared for everything. I am not too worried about Economics and Calc4. I am slightly worried about CS 206 - Discrete Structures II. I am highly tensed about CS 211 - Computer Architecture. And I am extremely nervous with regards to Phyiscs I. I don't think there's a pattern here as to which subjects I feel are easy or hard. Basically I'm worried about the subjects in which I haven't done too well till date (CS211 & Physics), and not too worried about the ones I've done good in (Econ & Calc4).

Other than academics, I got a lot of pending stuff in college. First off, my tuition! At $6200 a semester, my college is taking away almost every penny that I have in my bank account :( I'm not gonna pay up till the next week, but still, it's gonna hurt real bad to see my nice four-figure balance drop to two figures :( Well anyway, at least my job on campus is going good. One of the systems I made is under extensive pre-user testing right now and will be in place for the general student/faculty users in January once college starts. My latest project is just starting to shape up well and hopefully I'll have something substantial before Xmas. Remember, I can't talk in detail about my work because of confidentiality reasons (I feel like a secret agent right now. Teehee...)

Oh tonight the sorority that Mich is a 'sister' in, is throwing a party and I'm invited. The theme is 'Sex on the Beach' (Don't get any dirty thoughts! 'Sex on the Beach' is actually a well-known cocktail. Check out its molecular-structure here! Hehe...) After I'm done w/ my two pre-exam review sessions today (Physics & Calc4), I'll go do some work + studies till the party starts :) I'm 99.99% crashing over on campus. Don't really wanna get back home in that *condition* you know. Hehe.

Ok so now we come to the most expensive detail of my life. Car. More specifically the 2003 Mitsubishi Lancer GS. Well, I got a real good quote from a local dealer and I can lease (=rent) the car for 3 years for $245/month. I can totally afford that! No problem. So why didn't I buy it already? What am I waiting for? Well you see, I'm in New Jersey, the state with the worst auto-insurance policy in the whole country, where the rates keep going up more and more! So interestingly, guess how much it would cost me to insure a car that I can lease for $245 a month? Hold your breath... $365 A MONTH!!! Yes, that's how much my insurance company told me would cost me a month IF I leased that loveleh Lancer. Can I afford it? Yes. But am I stupid enough to pay more money to insure a non-luxury economic family-sedan than actually lease it? NO! I can understand $200/month on insurance for a brand-new car, but how can insurance cost me 150% of cost of the car itself? I'd rather buy TWO cars! And if anything goes wrong with the first one, I will use the second damn car! It'll be CHEAPER! And I'll appear 'rich'. Hehe.

Ya so I'm REALLY pissed about the whole car thing. I asked my insurance company, (which is well-known for being the best company with cheapest rates) as to which car would I have to buy to keep my insurance low. Her answer was: "For any car you buy as a PRIMARY driver, you'll have to pay over $250 a month, since you are a single male, under 25, with less than 3 years of driving history. It's best if you buy a car in Jan 2004."

But dammit, I can't wait THAT long. I NEED a car right away. And I need more money to afford it. Well you know what I do when I feel like I don't have enough money? No, I don't try to 'save' money. I don't begin to cut-corners, save pennies, or collect coupons. I don't try to curtail my expenses smartly. And I sure as hell don't cry and whine that I have no money. I MAKE MORE MONEY :) That's what I'm gonna do now. If I have to earn an extra $5k a year to afford a car, by God's name that's exactly what I am gonna do, no matter what! If that means I have to work 20 hours a day and sleep less than 3 hours (it takes me at least one hour to brush, shave, shower, eat etc.), I'm gonna do it. I WANT MY BLOODY CAR! Hehe. Ahhhhhh sometimes it feels good to be mildly enraged. Hehe.

Have you noticed? I almost never ever get angry. Getting angry I feel is a sign of weakness (except in case of my dad, cuz everytime he gets angry, he gets even more powerful! hehe). So anyway, I keep changing subjects a lot. I think the appropriate phrase is: Random digression. My friends call me the 'Random Boy', because I might be talking about something and all of a sudden I jump to something else.

Ok back to reality, I gotta go to college now. Hopefully Angie's gonna get me free food @ the dining hall. Yay! Remember that quote about free food? Yup, it's the best kinda food in the world. Mmmmmm. Anyways, I feel like I've talking enough. I realize now that no matter how quiet I want to be sometimes, most of the times I like to yap non-stop! Conclusion? This 'blog will survive. Don't worry.

I never thought I would ever reach this point, but today, I feel as if I have nothing to say. Right now, other than this 'nothing-to-say' thing, there is really nothing I wish to share, comment on, or discuss. There is nothing going on that makes me wanna talk non-stop, and nothing so extraordinary that I am overly excited about. Things are good. Nothing's wrong. It's not too boring or dull either. It's just that I don't feel like talking anymore. I think this has happened because I haven't met any new people recently, and have pretty much nothing new to say to the ones I already know well. Sure I can say how much my Physics exam is scaring me, but it's nothing new. I can probably say dinner was good tonight, but it's always been equally good. I worked and studied and got back home, but I don't think any of that makes a difference to my existence.

I was always afraid that some time in the future, a day would come when I would stop wanting to write this 'blog, and last few days have seemed like it. While there are times when I would love to be able to write a 'blog entry on the spot (like when I woke up and saw snow for the first time this year, or just after I played football w/ the guys), I honestly don't think I feel any excitement at writing a 'blog past midnight when I have nothing to say in particular, other than recite my day's itinerary. I used to love updating my 'blog, not just because I like receiving feedback from lotsa people, but basically because I liked talking about things. Right now, I feel like I've said enuf in life. It's time for me to just shut up and do. Too much talk and blabber is not too good for anyone anyways.

Interestingly, none of this is having any effect on my mood, studies, work or anything. I'm doing the same things as I always did, except without trying to start conversations with random unknown people, and without trying to keep speaking non-stop all the time. Probably it's good; maybe it's bad. Frankly, I'd just like to stop here right now and go to bed :) I don't know when I'll update the 'blog again. Just don't hold your breath waitin' for an update. It could be as soon as next 5 minutes, or who knows... never ever again? Damn just thinking that this might be my last 'blog ever, makes me all nostalgic of when I started this last year.

Oh well, g'nite world.

Had Calc4 exam today. It was ok. Nothing that great.

Just downloaded six songs. Too tired to make the hyperlinks, but here they are: Madonna's Die Another Day, Missy Eliot's Work It, Sean Paul's Gimme the Light, Jon Bon Jovi's Everyday, Remy Zero's Smallville Soundtrack, Save Me, and the old classic by Suzanne Vega, Tom's Diner.

Got Calculus 4 exam tomorrow. Gonna study all night!

Just got home early. Didn't wanna attend the looooong economics class. Oh and cool stuffs. I chilled with Lisa (from Calc4) for a couple of hours. We went to McDonalds where I had my usual boring McSalad + Diet Coke while she had normal food, like normal humans. I wish I liked the fries and burgers etc. in McDonalds, but since I don't, the only thing I can eat there is the salads. Oh and I love Diet Coke. Everyone knows that :)

Ya so I was w/ her and we just talked and joked and scared the hell out of each other by discussing our Calc4 exam coming up on Thursday. She's a nice girl - one of my new best friends. Oh and hopefully she's takin' me to see Harry Potter II after our exam. I can't wait to get over with the damn exam. It just uses up all my time and brain. Hehe.

Anyways tonight, I have more studies to do. And still gotta complete the new websites that I've begun. So it'll be a busy night.

I don't remember when was the last time I said: "It's past my bed-time..." I'm studying for tomorrow's exam right now, since over 8 hours non-stop. Urghhhhhhhh. I'm very very nervous right now. It's a really big and important exam and I am not too sure of my capabilities in this class. I'm crossing my fingers and constantly studying... Sleep is a luxury, which I can't afford right now...

I think I did really good in my Computer Architecture exam. I really really really need a good grade in that exam, since I messed up the first one quite bad. And now I study for tomorrow's CS Discrete Structures exam! Yay for the 2nd wave of mid-terms!

Here's a little piece of advice for you all, from someone who's been through hell: When driving on a busy heavy-traffic highway, do NOT listen to George Carlin! I was laughing sooooooo hard that I almost hit 10 cars on my way home from college! I went to school to study for tomorrow's exam. Our Teaching Assistant is a really really nice guy and hopefully I'll do good in tomorrow's exam. *Fingers crossed*

I'm REALLY happy right now. I got my economics exam result - 44 out of 44 - the highest! I'm back baby ;-) Got 2 exams next week, and 2 exams the week after and lots of projects due soon. I think I'll do good now. I feel very encouraged.

Economics exam tomorrow. Me studying. Had a pretty good day today. Nothing out of the ordinary though. Big projects @ my work starting tomorrow.

Economics exam this week. Gotta go study...

Physics exam went bad. I got Comp. Architecture exam result yesterday - bad. I got Calc4 quiz back - bad. :( I need to study now... Bubye...

I should REALLY go and study, and stop making political statements, most importantly because I have an exam tomorrow, and also because no one probably cares what my political thoughts are.

Just woke up a few mins ago. For the first time in months I got some extra time to catch up on sleep. I really needed it badly. Well, my worries are not over yet. Tomorrow I got a big exam - Computer Architecture, where I have to know stuff multiplexers and flip-flops, things totally unrelated to what goes on in the real world. Anyways, I better get clean 'n shiny and then get started w/ studies, cuz I have NO idea what the hell is going on in that class. Hehe.

Wow! I'm done with my physics webassign! Yay!!! But it took me SIX HOURS! Damn I'm slow. Oh well, at least it's over. Tomorrow all day I study for my computer exam. After that about a week of peace - no exams...

I GOT MY MP3 PLAYER!!!!!! I'm sooooo excited. And oh my the sound quality is soooo good. Damn! I'm soooooooooooo happy. Hehe. Too bad I can't play with it... got a big economics exam tomorrow :(

Wow. It's October already.... Anyways, the Physics exam went pretty well. I hope I get a good grade.

Just 'bout to leave for my last exam... ahhhh... Wish me luck...

I'm still studying for my exam tomorrow :( Anyway this is how to make a useful website. And if you're really bored, go and draw an animal :)

Calculus is OVER! Yay! Finally! 3 terms of Calculus done! One more left :( Anyway, it was a good class, the teacher was very helpful, and it was fun studying with my friends. Ah... it's the end of an era... I have one more exam: Discrete Structures I (Computer) on Tuesday and then I'm done :) Yay!!! So even though I don't want to I still have to go and study now :( Uh uh...

Oh and I forgot, I just came back from Bombay Bistro (undisputably the BEST Indian food restaurant in New Jersey!!!) with my family. We all love the food there, especially Sneh and every time we go there, we come back soooooo filled up. Hehehe...

One down, two to go :) I mean Linear Algebra exam is over. I think it went pretty well, definitely much better than the 2nd mid-term. Calculus is on Sunday. Can you believe I have an exam on a SUNDAY???

Song for the day: "Dreamer" - Ozzy Osbourne

HELP!!! I just got shot! Twice in my right arm (for Typhoid and Polio) and once in my left arm (for Hepatitis A)! Ah the pain. I can't even type anymore and tomorrow I have a big exam... I just hope I don't feel sleepy or drowsy...

Can't believe it's May 7th already! Let than 3 weeks before I go home! Trust me that is all I'm thinking about these days... Oh and Linear Algebra... yeah that too... Exam is on Thursday. Me go study :-)

Song for the day: "Warning" - Incubus

And now my day starts! It's bed time for most ppl and I have sooooo much to do. Well I had a nice cold shower so I feel pretty fresh right now. Today's Calculus exam was ok. I'm just glad it's over!

OOOOOH MY GOD! Guess who woke me up this morning? My soon-to-be brother-in-law from India on an international long-distance call! My eldest cuzin Nikita is getting engaged to Mehul soon and the marriage will be in July! And guess what? I'm gonna be there!!!!! WOOOOHOOOOOOOO!!!

On a slightly pacified note, I have Calc3 exam today and I'm scared as hell. Yesterday whole day/night I was w/ Kath and we studied non-stop but I still don't feel all confident :( I hope I don't do as bad as my linear exams in this one.

I feel like the damn Weather channel guy cuz I keep complaining about the weather in here all the time but oh my god... today ended up being SUUUUUCH a hot day!!!! Ahhhh.. I have a really bad headache :( I'm going to take a loooong shower and hopefully will feel better. Gotta study all night tonight :(

Anyways I got my Linear exam results back and I got worse than I expected :( But it's ok, this is 33% of the grade and I still have a big final coming up within a few weeks. So I 'can' make it up, but it'll be hard.

I just found out my front-door neighbor is building a 24 foot swimming pool in his backyard!!!!!!! Woohoo!!! And we're really good friends with him too! Hope it's ready by the time I come back from India. Hehehe.

Have 3 classes @ college today - will prolly get my Linear exam paper back - I don't think I'll get more than 85/100 in this one. I really did bad :( But it's ok, I'm not too worried about my grades anymore. As long as I get B+ and A, I'm good. Hehe.

Tired. Had a looooong day. Haven't slept in 19 hours. I need to get some sleep. Had my linear exam today. It went ok. Nothing great. I might not get an A, but right now I don't care. I did my best.

Woohoo! I got all the classes I wanted for my Fall 2002 semester! Yay! Since I'm in University College, I get to register for my classes BEFORE all the other regular students! Guess I'm just damn lucky... hehehehe... But oh well, it's a full load: 18 credits with 6 subjects! I'm thinking whether I should take an Honors class also or not... 21 credits *might* be an overkill. I'm not sure @ the moment... but the good thing is... honors classes never become full (I hope) so I can actually register for them just a day before Fall 2002 semester starts.

Anyway I have a big Linear Algebra exam today. I've been studying a lot. And I've also got a lot of work to finish by tonight. Urgh! I guess I'll just go to the library and study now :(

Yet another long day @ college. I found out my computer class exam result and it is BAAAAD! I am soooo mad right now. Since I haven't seen the answer-sheet myself, I'm pretty sure that something's wrong here. I definitely did a lot better than what I got! Me mad! Urghhhh... Got workshop due tomorrow and lotsa work! Tomorrow is last day of college before Spring Break. Phew. Then about 10 days of rest :)

Just got back home. Had a pretty decent day @ college. Nuttin that interesting though. One good thing... I got my Linear Algebra quiz and Calc3 exam results... Let's just say I got good grades (cuz any more details and you'll think I'm trying to show off).

Oh and I spent almost half an hour before one of my classes sending sms (text message over cellular) to my brother Keval in Bombay! It was sooo much fun. My fingers hurt though. LOL.. Anyway it's dinner time! Yay! Tata...

Quote for the day: "Someday we, and by we I mean me, will be important..." - as quoted from some movie by some guy in the bus today.

YES!!!!! Calc3 Maple Lab 2 assignment finally completed!!! Took me three hours to learn Maple 7 and one hour to complete the lab assignment! Phew... I'm glad it's done... Tomorrow I'll study more for Calc3, cuz the exam is on Wednesday... :( I also have the Comp. Sci. Discrete Structures exam on Wednesday too! That means no sleep till Wednesday night! Oh and also the Research Methodology project is due on Wedneday.... Ahh... The Wonderful Wednesday...

Yes! I said 6:15 AM not PM! We just got a phone call from our alarm company that the alarm went off @ 5:30 am in our store! So my uncle and I went over to check it out. Nothing was missing. No break-in or anything. In the end, we came to the conclusion that some stupid balloon must have fluttered a bit due to air from the venting ducts, thereby triggering the motion detector. Great! I went to bed @ 2:30 am and woke up @ 5:30! Now I can't get back to sleep and I have an exam today. Ah wonderful!

Just had dinner while watching the climax of The Terminator. Right now I'm alone in the house, and guess what I'm watching while working? The Exorcist - Uncut! Damn I'm brave! Hahaha... I haven't seen this movie and have heard a lot of things about it. Also I don't want to sleep tonight because there is soooo much work. So I'm planning to get soo scared that I can't sleep, and that way I'll just stay up all night and finish my stuff. Tomorrow I study non-stop the whole day! URGH!!!!!! Linear Algebra exam on Monday :(

Phew. Finally got some time to write bout the party last night. Ok, I publically admit it... last night was the first time I actually got drunk! Yep. Me drinkin' alcohol. It wasn't beer. Beer's icky. I think I had like every random drink under the sun... Don't even know what I had. Ok here's what happened basically...

My friend Kathleen was having her old high-school friends over to her apartment to party last night (Thursday, Dec. 20). I had an exam on today at 12 noon. So I wasn't really sure if I should go and party all night or not, but oh well... she was just sooo nice that I couldn't refuse. Plus I wanted to meet all her girlfriends she talked about all the time ;-) So I went and oh my god... were they _____ (insert adjective of your own choice: cute / hot / great / nice / bootylicious).

The agenda for the party was pretty simple:

1. Drink...
2. Repeat step 1.

Haha! But damn it was fun. See the problem is a lot of people I know read this 'blog, so I can't be really graphic here. In short, I had a LOT of fun. I woke up this morning with no sign of hangover or anything. In fact I am pretty disappointed with the whole getting-drunk thing. I had like 10-12 shots of rum/tequila/vodka/whatever, 5-6 glasses of mixed drinks, and God only knows what else and I still felt nothing! But it was really fun to discover that I could not walk in a straight line! Haha!

There were a few pics taken... and I think I am in a couple of them. Will post the pics in here and on my photo gallery when I get them.

And don't worry Kath. You did NOT spoil me! Remember... I had my first beer before I learnt how to ride a bicycle! But of course the nicest part of the night that made me feel all mushy and blushy... was when Kath introduced me to all her friends and said that I was her bestest friend on campus :) At first I thought she was joking (or maybe a little tipsy) but turns out she was serious... Awwwwww girl! You're just sooo nice yourself. It's really great to have a friend like you :) Dammit! Now I miss my buddies Chetan and Vishal from Calcutta. God I love my friends...

Phew! College is OVER!!!!!! Just got back from Meteorology exam. I think I did pretty good. I got A in Music and Economics!!! Yey! Me happy.

Gotta study Stats I today. Exam tomorrow. All my friends think I'm weird cuz I study a lot! I'm sorry guys. I HAVE to study. That's the way it is.

Good morning. Just received some wonderful news -> I have been ordered by Kathleen and her roommates to party with them on Thursday right before my meteorology exam on Friday! I love my friends :) Meteorology exam is not that hard and I need like 80% to get an A. So all's good. Finally, I'll meet all the friends of my friends. Too bad college's gonna end soon. I mean, the part about no-more-studies-for-a-month is good, but college getting over also means I don't get to see my buddies for a whole months :( And I don't get to see Michele :( Booohoooooo

I didn't get a lot of problems correct in my Calc2 exam. But I sure as hell got a 100% in this Microsoft Compliance Quiz.

First final exam completed: Intro to Music 101. One down, four to go.

God I made the smallest stupidest mistake in Calc2 exam yet again. Well on the bright side, I got the highest again: 99 / 100. But come on! How can I soooo stupidly forget that it should be "2n + 1" instead of "n + 1" !!!

Just got back home. I think I did pretty good in my Calc2 exam. Not very sure though. I might have made a silly mistake here and there.

Tomorrow we have a party @ our house and about 100-110 people are gonna come over. Meaning everyone has to do a LOT of work to prepare for the evening. I personally have to peel potatoes, peel onions, lift and setup tables, rent about 100 chairs and set them up, set up the computer and big screen tv for the game that I'm gonna host, and blah blah blah. I'm still dead tired from my Calc exam late-nights and lack of sleep. My friends say I look like a zombie... oh well... I'll be happy on Sunday! No work no more! (Or that's what I HOPE)...

Woohoo ! I'm home early! But I think I did not-that-good in both Calc2 quiz and Meteorology exam :(

Who cares! I had a pretty good day anyway!

Just back home. Got a Calc quiz tomorrow and a Meteorology exam thereafter. Damn tonight I'll have to study sooo hard. I had a pretty good day @ college, and still am soooo excited from the great news I got this morning!

Just returned from a wonderful Graduate Recital, conducted by John Eisenhauer at Rutgers Kirkpatrick Chapel. It was mostly Renaissance and Baroque Era vocal music and some of the performances were pretty great. I particularly liked Schubert's German songs sung by the RU Glee Club. My pal Andy was a part of it! Cool huh?

Now the only not-so-good thing about this whole thing is, that I have to write a 2-3 page concert paper on tonight's performances. Well as soon as I'm done w/ it, I'll post it here too (in my college papers section). Plus I gotta study for my music exam tomorrow... Arghhhhhh... Can't I just have one single night of peace and quiet ?

I think I did good in my Stats exam. Not very sure though. Might have screwed up a couple of things. All in all, today was a pretty annoying day. I'm sleepy right now and still have to read about 150 pages for my econ. exam tomorrow :(And also today the anonymous cute girl in my Calc 2 class did not come :( So I guess I'm not gonna tell you anything more about her.

Welcome to my glamorous life! I have been studying non-stop for over 13 hours now (except 3 eat-fast-or-die breaks). And come to think of it, I have to put up with this schedule for the next 7-8 years till I become a PhD. God!!!! Why do I wanna be a PhD anyway? I dunno. I guess I just have to. Plus my mom will love me for it ;-)

As I study for my Stats exam tomorrow, I keep thinking about that anonymous cute girl in my Calc 2 class. Ah... I don't even know her name :( But I'm not gonna tell you more about her now. Let's see if I get to see her tomorrow and then I'll decide if the world is ready to know more about my secret crush. Hehe.

I'm supposed to be studying for my damn eco exam! God my teacher sux! Tonight I study... :-(